prisoners of blue prints..
a few years back , i lost a very close friend to a gruesome murder. While the incident by itself was traumatic, it was qualified by an added dimension...
those days, i used to be randomly intuitive and sometimes just predict...typical college level past-time..for me , it was not an acquired skill however..it just had randomly happened and i enjoyed a reasonable reputation...
it was the ganesh utsav festival in our locality....as volunteers , we used to stay the night in the pandal...one such night , at about 2 am, this friend of mine insisted i read his palm....i was reluctant, but he kept persisting...i just glanced at it, and the words just sprang out of me...take care..u are in line for a violent death before ur birthday..his birthday was on dec 6th.
a hushed silence followed....the entire group was aware that this friend had started moving in undesirable circles....he had gotten into drugs, the underworld etc through routine college networks...and was on his way out of such connections...an unacceptable happening in such equations....we also knew the personal traumas that had made him gravitate thus...
we decided to organize what is known as "fielding" in mumbaiyya parlance...one of us would always be with him to avoid any untoward flare - ups...thus it was for about 2 months...
on dec 1st , i was with him at our local khatta....those were not the days of mobile cell phones...it was twilight hour...
i was called by somebody saying there was telephone call for me...i went in...it was a dud call...and in the meantime , my friend had been butchered with 13 stab wounds.. i had to do the honours of identifying and claiming his body...
while his death was itself a shock, a deeper personal q troubled me...i had been able to predict because there was something predictable...a pattern which led him there....so what about free will and the power of our choices....it rankled me no end...i felt a lot of resentment at my ignorance on this fundamental aspect....there were various theories but none that i could actually authebticate for myself...they were just theories, nothing more, for me.
was a critical trigger in the process of my explores..i did discover to my dismay that we were indeed prisoners of a blueprint, a set of patterns accumalated from myriad sources...next q , are we condemned in such space?
i discovered that , the blue print is a mind impress....a kind of a pattern from past life impressions, fundamental childhood decisions and so on.....most of these blueprints take shape by the time we are 5-6 years old..a few even happen later....
and it is possible to be liberated of the mind...when we discover spaces beyond the mind....
this does not imply that "we lose our mind".....
the mind is a wonderful faculty that we have to use....unfortunately, it has begun using us....
for me, understanding the whole dynamic of grace played a critical role in this process...i am still in process...learning by the moment.....
but i am experiencing much greater freedom inside me than say `10 years back when these questions crippled and paralysed me...i am able to breathe...
i see the world as multi-media classroom designed to set us free....through the bridge of events that occur in our lives...each event comes with its learning...but then we have to learn to learn...
those days, i used to be randomly intuitive and sometimes just predict...typical college level past-time..for me , it was not an acquired skill however..it just had randomly happened and i enjoyed a reasonable reputation...
it was the ganesh utsav festival in our locality....as volunteers , we used to stay the night in the pandal...one such night , at about 2 am, this friend of mine insisted i read his palm....i was reluctant, but he kept persisting...i just glanced at it, and the words just sprang out of me...take care..u are in line for a violent death before ur birthday..his birthday was on dec 6th.
a hushed silence followed....the entire group was aware that this friend had started moving in undesirable circles....he had gotten into drugs, the underworld etc through routine college networks...and was on his way out of such connections...an unacceptable happening in such equations....we also knew the personal traumas that had made him gravitate thus...
we decided to organize what is known as "fielding" in mumbaiyya parlance...one of us would always be with him to avoid any untoward flare - ups...thus it was for about 2 months...
on dec 1st , i was with him at our local khatta....those were not the days of mobile cell phones...it was twilight hour...
i was called by somebody saying there was telephone call for me...i went in...it was a dud call...and in the meantime , my friend had been butchered with 13 stab wounds.. i had to do the honours of identifying and claiming his body...
while his death was itself a shock, a deeper personal q troubled me...i had been able to predict because there was something predictable...a pattern which led him there....so what about free will and the power of our choices....it rankled me no end...i felt a lot of resentment at my ignorance on this fundamental aspect....there were various theories but none that i could actually authebticate for myself...they were just theories, nothing more, for me.
was a critical trigger in the process of my explores..i did discover to my dismay that we were indeed prisoners of a blueprint, a set of patterns accumalated from myriad sources...next q , are we condemned in such space?
i discovered that , the blue print is a mind impress....a kind of a pattern from past life impressions, fundamental childhood decisions and so on.....most of these blueprints take shape by the time we are 5-6 years old..a few even happen later....
and it is possible to be liberated of the mind...when we discover spaces beyond the mind....
this does not imply that "we lose our mind".....
the mind is a wonderful faculty that we have to use....unfortunately, it has begun using us....
for me, understanding the whole dynamic of grace played a critical role in this process...i am still in process...learning by the moment.....
but i am experiencing much greater freedom inside me than say `10 years back when these questions crippled and paralysed me...i am able to breathe...
i see the world as multi-media classroom designed to set us free....through the bridge of events that occur in our lives...each event comes with its learning...but then we have to learn to learn...
i am no special human..just a face in the crowd , with a desire to live, not merely exist...but then, life had pushed me to corners from where I had no choice but to find a way or to succumb....in a way, i see that as a blessing in disguise...
guess, there maybe as many routes and discoveries as there are humans..unique domains of explores....in our own universes...
i wish and pray that every single human who experiences such suffocation within should discover these dimensions beyond their blueprints..which can set them free....if they so desire it...
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